If we had more time what would we do?

I started studying psychology (a very slow start, module one of twenty four...) this year as a passion degree. I love peoples stories, understanding how we come to being us, why we sometimes believe more in others than ourselves; enhancing the stress of acting in an unnatural or uncomfortable ways. Today, while doing my topic on Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s disease — two diseases where, in simple layman’s terms, brain cells begin to die where treatments may help navigate symptoms but ultimately there is no cure — I found myself reflecting on a naked truth: the beginning is the end.

I watched a video on the ethical, scientific and religious debate around embryonic stem cell research — embryos that, at the blastocyst stage (around day 5–7), contain pluripotent cells that could one day be guided to become dopamine‑producing neurons for Parkinson’s disease. These embryos are almost always surplus IVF embryos, donated with consent. Extracting the inner cell mass destroys the blastocyst, which is the heart of the ethical tension.

Listening to researchers, patients, religious leaders, philosophers, policy makers and doctors, I heard them debate what life is, when does life start, when does the soul enter, and how we protect all forms of human life but in order to protect human life the contradiction when is it considered human life?

But the question I kept asking — was: When is life enough?  

And right behind it: What do we do with the life we in, right now? If we had more life what would we do with it? 

I believe in choices - every person choices. We have abortion (a woman's choice) and an oversupply of embryonic eggs for IVF (a woman desperately wanting her own baby), and on the other hand we have researchers who could potentially find solutions to incurable diseases. We debate day zero, day 14 — the internationally recognised limit for embryo research — while some people in their sixties begin living debilitating lives as neurodegenerative diseases quietly rewrite their futures. Which life is important? How do we end? How do we begin?

Where is the middle, and what do we do in that middle?

We talk about that last breath — the moment when life flashes before us and we wish for one more day, one more chance to choose differently. Every day is that day. Every moment is the chance to be brave, to prioritise differently, to live differently.

We hope to experience grandchildren and great‑grandchildren — dreams dependent on whether we chose to have children at all. We dream of retirement — but what does that mean? Enough savings for a time in our life when our bodies start to retire or enough memories and experience to slow down for ourselves. Are our children able to be independent? And what happens to everything we collected? How important is what we think to be important?

I lived that answer recently. A house, filled with 25 years of life, cleared in four hours. Solid wood. Persian carpets. Pure linen. Entire wardrobes of handpicked pieces, each one telling a story, a stage, a memory. All gone, auctioned. With it came relief, freedom and came the certainty I am never doing that again! Picasso or Shakespeare said the “purpose of life is to discover your gift, the meaning of life is to give it away”.

What is my gift? What is your gift? Are we giving more than we are taking from the world? In Hinduism we are guided by karma and reincarnation - that this life will determine the next? Because it reminds us that the spiritual journey is equally as important at the physical one.

Maybe my gift is the way I show up for people — the leader who tries to build confidence, empathy and accountability in herself and others. Maybe it’s the CFO who grew margins in the belief that profit will be used with purpose: for research and differentiation, for consumer experience, for making people’s lives better.

I reflect on my corporate career- I follow debates on healthcare and feel proud of AstraZeneca and Eli Lilly — proud of the dedication to patient health, proud that I still engage and debate in the conversation about research and patent protection. I walk into a KFC and smile because it’s 100% chicken, no funny business, and still argue with my son about choosing KFC over any other QSR. I walk past the cereal aisle and remember the debates about Fruit Loops and Cocoa Pops being 100% natural colourants, pricing and that consumers complained the colour and the milk after the cereal was eaten was not as tasty! And today - using information to enable accessible and meaningful credit purchases whilst protecting identity from fraud.

Maybe my gift is the woman I am today — living in a world of high stress and materialistic want, being quietly authentic. Maybe it’s the story of the single mum. Maybe it’s the woman in corporate who tries to influence culture to be consistently inclusive. Maybe it’s the girl who made as many mistakes as she made wins, who built resilience and learned to love imperfection. Maybe its the vulnerability to share the stories so that each person reading them reflects on their own stories and feels warmth, love and courage to follow their heart. In the business of everyday, how many minutes do we spend taking stock or simply reflecting on am I happy? If life ended today, would I smile that I have lived or will I wish for one more chance to do something differently.

And maybe the purpose I got right is this: to give it away.

My 46 years are now spread across homes in two countries, and I hope every item someone picks up in a vintage store, auction house or charity shop brings them luck, comfort, and love. You would never know the story that lies with it, or the heart that gave it away. I wish that every person who reads a story of mine finds a smile, wipes a tear or remembers that there is always a choice. No one ever said that choice will be easy, the question is - if what is at the end of it is worth it.

So how does this relate to the debate of embryonic stem cell research?

 I don’t know. At the end of the video, it came down to one truth: being human, but more importantly, being humane. Making consciousness and responsible decisions is the choice of every patient, scientist, doctor, philosopher and government. In a world where AI is influencing decisions without consciousness or intuition, would these debates even happen? It will depend on the interpreter. It is crucial that we teach humanity, humanity. I think about organ donors and their families — the balance of nature, the truth that nothing is given without something being taken. It is each of us everyday in every moment to act with intention.

Maybe the middle is simply this:

Life is enough when we choose to live it with intention, compassion and courage.  

And what we do with the life we have — is our daily choice.